The following inspiration quotes are short enough to keep on your mind but still heavy enough to put a bounce in your step. Some people want “inspirational” short quotes, and still other people are looking for something to remind them of the meaninglessness of life.

Whatever type you are, the following list of quotes has something you can use to brighten your day.

In spite of the cost of living, it’s still popular.

Kathy Norris

To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else.

Emily Dickinson

Yes, I will try to be. Because I believe that not being is arrogant.

Antonio Porchia

Life is the hyphen between matter and spirit.

Augustus William Hare

My life has a superb cast but I can’t figure out the plot.

Ashleigh Brilliant

I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.

Bill Watterson

You fall out of your mother’s womb, you crawl across open country under fire, and drop into your grave.

Quentin Crisp

As we struggle to make sense of things, life looks on in repose.

Unknown

I think I’ve discovered the secret of life – you just hang around until you get used to it.

Charles Schulz

Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets.

Arthur Miller

Life is like a blanket too short. You pull it up and your toes rebel, you yank it down and shivers meander about your shoulder; but cheerful folks manage to draw their knees up and pass a very comfortable night.

Marion Howard

Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.

Unknown

You can’t escape history, or the needs and neuroses you’ve picked up like layers and layers of tartar on your teeth.

Charles Johnson

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can.

Danny Kaye

I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. Empty what’s full. Scratch where it itches.

Alice Roosevelt Longworth

Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once.

Lillian Dickson

We are born wet, naked, and hungry. Then things get worse.

Unknown

Life is a cement trampoline.

Howard Nordberg

To preserve a man alive in the midst of so many chances and hostilities, is as great a miracle as to create him.

Jeremy Taylor

He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be.

Grandma Moses

I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.

Jim Carrey

Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies.

Erich Fromm

My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.

Cary Grant

To live remains an art which everyone must learn, and which no one can teach.

Havelock Ellis

Don’t think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Let him come out as I do, and bark.

Samuel Johnson

Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: “I am with you kid. Let’s go.”

Maya Angelou

Life has meaning only if one barters it day by day for something other than itself.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

‘Tis all a chequer board of nights and days,

Where destiny with men for pieces plays;

Hither and thither, and mates, and slays.

Edward Fitzgerald, The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyám, 1859

…the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.

Walt Whitman

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Mark Twain

Life is the game that must be played.

Edwin Arlington Robinson

You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.

Albert Camus

There is no wealth but life.

John Ruskin

I know what things are good: friendship and work and conversation. These I shall have.

Rupert Brooke

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.

Henry David Thoreau

Eating, loving, singing and digesting are, in truth, the four acts of the comic opera known as life, and they pass like bubbles of a bottle of champagne. Whoever lets them break without having enjoyed them is a complete fool.

Gioacchino Rossini

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.

T.S. Eliot

Life was a damned muddle – a football game with everyone offside and the referee gotten rid of – everyone claiming the referee would have been on his side.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

Any idiot can face a crisis – it’s day to day living that wears you out.

Anton Chekhov

I count life just a stuff / To try the soul’s strength on.

Robert Browning

Life is an incurable Disease.

Abraham Cowley

The philosophy of mine earth can be summed up as this: Sunshine creates happiness, and I create myself. Nights are long and life is predominantly good. Wind is refreshing. Tea is wisdom. Do the best you can, and be good to yourself so that you can above all be good to others.

Jessi Lane Adams

Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique, and not too much imagination.

Christopher Isherwood

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone.

Reba McEntire

The tragedy of life is not so much what men suffer, but rather what they miss.

Thomas Carlyle

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.

Joseph Addison

The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.

Heywood Broun

We’re all accidental soldiers in the army of life.

Ymber Delecto

Life is a long process of getting tired.

Samuel Butler

He who has nothing to die for has nothing to live for.

Moroccan Proverb

But now I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

Umberto Eco, Foucault’s Pendulum

God asks no man whether he will accept life. That is not the choice. You must take it. The only question is how.

Henry Ward Beecher

Here are the best quotes by famous people. Go ahead — use them. They’re celeb-tested and approved.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance

Oscar Wilde

Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

Jimi Hendrix

A clever man commits no minor blunders.

Goethe

Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they’re yours.

Richard Bach

A witty saying proves nothing.

Voltaire (1694-1778)

Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera.

James Stephens (1882-1950)

The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it’s their fault.

Henry Kissinger (1923-)

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

Will Durant

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

Xenocrates (396-314 B.C.)

It was the experience of mysteryeven if mixed with fearthat engendered religion.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough.

Mario Andretti

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are surethat is all that agnosticism means.

Clarence Darrow, Scopes trial, 1925.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

Henry Ford (1863-1947)

I’ll sleep when I’m dead.

Warren Zevon (1947-2003)

There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.

Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.

Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, they finish by loading honors on your head.

Jean Cocteau (1889-1963)

Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.

Georg Lichtenberg (1742-1799)

Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it

Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)

While we are postponing, life speeds by.

Seneca

Fill what’s empty, empty what’s full, and scratch where it itches.

the Duchess of Windsor, when asked what is the secret of a long and happy life

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Mel Brooks

Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.

Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)

Wit is educated insolence.

Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher.

Socrates (470-399 B.C.)

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.

Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.

Gore Vidal

Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

Samuel Palmer (1805-80)

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.

Aristotle Onassis (1906-1975)

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Guy Davenport

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Niels Bohr (1885-1962)

We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?

Niels Bohr (1885-1962)

When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.

Buckminster Fuller (1895-1983)

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it’s the exact opposite.

Paul Dirac (1902-1984)

I would have made a good Pope.

Richard M. Nixon (1913-1994)

In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.

W.B. Prescott

Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.

John von Neumann (1903-1957)

The mistakes are all waiting to be made.

chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956) on the game’s opening position

It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims.

Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.

Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)

Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

What do you take me for, an idiot?

General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy

I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.

Bill Hirst

Three o’clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.

Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.

Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)

A man can’t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)

Logic is in the eye of the logician.

Gloria Steinem

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

William Jennings Bryan (1860-1925)

Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.

Martin Fraquhar Tupper

Thank you for sending me a copy of your bookI’ll waste no time reading it.

Moses Hadas (1900-1966)

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

Groucho Marx (1895-1977)

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

When ideas fail, words come in very handy.

Goethe (1749-1832)

In the end, everything is a gag.

Charlie Chaplin (1889-1977)

The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

Lucille S. Harper

You got to be careful if you don’t know where you’re going, because you might not get there.

Yogi Berra

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

Walt Disney (1901-1966)

He who hesitates is a damned fool.

Mae West (1892-1980)

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

Gail Godwin

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Henry Kissinger (1923-)

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.

Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970)

You can pretend to be serious; you can’t pretend to be witty.

Sacha Guitry (1885-1957)

For more information about the best famous people quotes, see:

• Quotes by Famous People

These quotes should uplift and inspire Christians and give them the strength to carry on just a little further.

Christianity is not a theory or speculation, but a life; not a philosophy of life, but a living presence. — Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Christian life consists of faith and charity. — Martin Luther

The purpose of Christianity is not to avoid difficulty, but to produce a character adequate to meet it when it comes. It does not make life easy; rather it tries to make us great enough for life. — James L. Christensen

Life is an adventure in forgiveness. — Norman Cousins

The fewer the words, the better the prayer. — Martin Luther

Whatever makes men good Christians, makes them good citizens. — Daniel Webster

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen. Not only because I see it, but because I see everything by it. — C.S. Lewis

To be like Christ is to be a Christian. — Daniel Webster

The measure of a Christian is not in the height of his grasp but in the depth of his love. — Clarence Jordan

A Christian is a keyhole through which other folk see God. — Robert E. Gibson

We should live our lives as though Christ was coming this afternoon. – Jimmy Carter

This world is God’s workshop for making men in. — Henry Ward Beecher

The whole of creation, with all of its laws, is a revelation of God. — Dean William Ralph Inge

Walk boldly and wisely….There is a hand above that will help you on. — Philip James Bailey

A word fitly spoken in like apples of gold in pictures of silver. — Proverbs 25:11

Let thy words be few. — Ecclesiastes 5:2

The words of a wise man’s mouth are gracious; but the lips of a fool will swallow up himself. — Ecclesiastes 10:12

Wisdom strengtheneth the wise more than ten mighty men which are in the city. — Ecclesiastes 7:19

And he changeth the times and the seasons: he removeth kings, and setteth up kings: he giveth wisdom unto the wise, and knowledge to them that know understanding — Daniel 2:21

Also take no heed unto all words that are spoken; lest thou hear thy servant curse thee: for oftentimes also thine own heart knoweth that thou thyself likewise hast cursed others. — Ecclesiastes 7:21-22

Which things also we speak, not in the words which man’s wisdom teaches, but which the Holy Spirit teaches. — Corinthians 2:13

Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.

Exalt her, and she shall promote thee: she shall bring thee to honor, when thou dost embrace her.

She shall give to thine head an ornament of grace: a crown of glory shall she deliver to thee.

Hear, O my son, and receive my sayings; and the years of thy life shall be many.

I have taught thee in the way of wisdom; I have led thee in right paths.

When thou goest, thy steps shall not be straitened; and when thou runnest, thou shalt not stumble.

Take fast hold of instruction; let her not go: keep her; for she is thy life. Proverbs 4:7-13

Whether you like it or not, whether you know it or not, secretly all nature seeks God and works toward him. — Meister Eckhart

One on God’s side is a majority. — Wendell Phillips

The stars rule men but God rules the stars. –Christoph Cellarius

All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

God helps the brave. — Johann Christoph Freidrich von Schiller

True happiness is not found in any other reward than that of being united with God. – Thomas Merton

Every man’s life is a fairy tale written by God’s fingers. – Hans Christian Andersen

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths. — Proverbs 3:5-6

There is no emptiness of soul ever for those whose life is devoted to God. — William Lawson

A true love of God must begin with a delight in his holiness. — Jonathan Edwards

Never think that God’s delays are God’s denials.

Hold on! hold fast! hold out! Patience is genius. — Georges L.L. de Buffon

All who call on God in true faith, earnestly from the heart, will certainly be heard, and will receive what they have asked and desired. — Martin Luther

God’s greatness flow around our incompleteness;

Round our restlessness, his rest.– Elizabeth Barrett Browning

God is a good worker but loves to be helped. — Basque Proverb

Earth, with her thousand voices, praises God. — Samuel Taylor Coleridge

God enters by a private door into every individual. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s only forgetting yourself that you draw near to God. — Henry David Thoreau

In whatever direction you turn, you will see God coming to meet you; nothing is void of him, he himself fills all his work. — Seneca The Younger

No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us. — John 4:12

When you’re feeling down sometimes you want to do nothing but listen to the blues and watch the rain run down the window. These sad love and life quotes are perfect for a downer mood or a dreary day.

You never know what you have until you lose it.

It’s funny how a person can break your heart, and you can still love them with all the little pieces

When you left, I lost a part of me

A million words would not bring you back, I know because I tried, neither would a million tears, I know because I cried

My heart was taken by you, broken by you, and now it is in pieces because of you.

If you love me like you told me, please be careful with my heart; you can take it; just don’t break it or my world will fall apart.

Don’t cry over anyone who won’t cry over you.

The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else

If you love me, let me know. If not, please gently let me go

My heart was taken by you, broken by you and now it’s in pieces because of you

I hate this feeling, it’s one I know all to well, it’s a thing called heartbreak and it hurts like hell

How could an angel break me heart?

Listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye

Tears are words the hard can’t express

Pleasure of love lasts but a moment, Pain of love lasts a lifetime

Sometimes the memories are worth the pain

Everytime we talk, I fall a little harder

You never were and you never will be mine

Love is like heaven but can hurt like hell

My heart bleeds no more since turning to stone

You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it

When I see you smile and know that its not for me, that’s when I miss you the most

You never know what you have until its gone

The times we were happy together are worth the times I cry alone

Take a look at me now, cause there’s just an empty space. And you coming back to me is against all odds and that’s what I’ve got to face. – Phil Collins

This is a song for the lonely, can you hear me tonight? For the broken hearted, battle scarred I’ll be by your side. – Cher

The best way to mend a broken heart is time and girlfriends

Cry as I may these tears won’t wash you away

Real loss only occurs when you lose something you love more than yourself

Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened

Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you and you meant nothing to him

All I know is that I’m lost without you

It’s amazing how someone can break your heart and you can still love them with all the little pieces

Wherever you are, you’ll always be in my heart

I wish I saved all the tears I cried for you so I could drown you in them

Every time I see him all cool, calm and collected, I lose my breath, my heart starts pounding, and I am painfully aware that I am not over him and he is over me

While I was holding on, all you did was let go

As soon as forever is through, I’ll be over you

Back in school, they didn’t teach us what we needed to know, like how to deal with despair or a broken heart.

I gave you my heart and you broke it. Now you love me but I don’t love you.

How many times can your heart break until there’s nothing left to be broken?

It will be better to fall from a tree and break your leg than to fall in love and break your heart.

It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.

True love is when you shed a tear and still want him.

For more information about sad love and life quotes, visit:

• Depression Quotes

Here’s my favorite funny and cute quotes about life.

“You haven’t lost your smile at all, it’s right under your nose. You just forgot it was there.”

“Love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends”

“If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we’re apart.. i’ll always be with you.”

Winnie the Pooh

“Some love one, some love two. I love one, and that is you.”

“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.”

A. A. Milne

“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.”

Charles Schulz

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.”

“Cats are magical. . .the more you pet them the longer you both live.”

“True love stories never have endings”

“Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he’ll have to touch it to be sure.”

“Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.”

Will Rogers

“No one is listening until you fart.”

“I find I always have to write something on a steamed mirror.”

Elaine Dundy

“People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.”

Dave Barry

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.”

Robert Frost

“There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking. ”

Theodore Rubin

“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it.”

Jack Handey

“Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.”

Elbert Hubbard

“Time may be a great healer, but it s also a lousy beautician.”

“An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world. A pessimist fears that this is true.”

“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT’S relativity.”

Albert Einstein

“I’m not afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”

Woody Allen

“There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”

Oscar Wilde

“The cost of living’s going up, and the chance of livin’s going down.”

Flip Wilson

“All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.”

Sean O’Casey

We all need a little boost every now and then. Inspirational quotes are a quick and easy way to boost your mood and your morale.

Beauty is not something you buy; instead, beauty is what lies within.

Byron Pulsifer

Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.

Kahlil Gibran

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears.

Edgar Allen Poe

Beauty is all around us amidst strife and turmoil to be seen by those who look not to those who wish.

Byron Pulsifer

We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.

Jawaharlal Nehru

Goals are the fuel in the furnace of achievement.

Brian Tracy

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

Henry Ford

I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.

Jimmy Dean

If you don’t know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.

Lawrence J. Peter

A goal without a plan is just a wish.

Larry Elder

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.

Les Brown

Truth isn’t all about what actually happens but more about how what has happened is interpreted.

Byron Pulsifer

Truth is generally the best vindication against slander.

Abraham Lincoln

False history gets made all day, any day, the truth of the new is never on the news.

Adrienne Rich

All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.

Galileo Galilei

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.

Albert Einstein

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

In my day, we didn’t have self-esteem, we had self-respect, and no more of it than we had earned.

Jane Haddam

He that respects himself is safe from others; he wears a coat of mail that none can pierce.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

If you have no respect for your own values how can you be worthy of respect from others.

Byron Pulsifer

Respect is not something that you can ask for, buy or borrow. Respect is what you earn from each person no matter their background or status.

Byron Pulsifer

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.

Frederick Douglass

If one is estranged from oneself, then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature.

Anne Frank

Birth, life, and death — each took place on the hidden side of a leaf.

Toni Morrison

After sleeping through a hundred million centuries we have finally opened our eyes on a sumptuous planet, sparkling with color, bountiful with life. Within decades we must close our eyes again. Isn’t it a noble, an enlightened way of spending our brief time in the sun, to work at understanding the universe and how we have come to wake up in it? This is how I answer when I am asked – as I am surprisingly often – why I bother to get up in the mornings.

Richard Dawkins

The happiest man is he who learns from nature the lesson of worship.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Those who dwell, as scientists or laymen, among the beauties and mysteries of the earth are never alone or weary of life.

Rachel Carson

I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in the kindness of human beings. I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven and angels.

Pearl S. Buck

Elton John has performed some of the greatest pop music of the past 100 years. His songs (like “Candle in the Wind” and “Crocodile Rock”) are rock and roll classics, performed by one of the masters of the music world.

Here are some favorite famous Elton John quotes.

An agent is a person who is sore because an actor gets 90% of what they make.

Elton John

And there’s no guarantee that if you get HIV and you take these triple therapies, or whatever comes along next, that they’re going to be successful for you.

Elton John

Bands today have to learn their craft by putting the hard work in that we did when we were young performers.

Elton John

And I agreed with that, and I couldn’t wait to change my name anyway, because I’m not too fond of the name of Reginald. It’s a very kind of ’50s English name.

Elton John

And I talked to my doctor, and I must admit, you know, I’m sometimes quite renowned for my outbursts and I was just very frustrated, maybe a little frightened.

Elton John

And I trusted someone to look after me on the business side of life.

Elton John

And I’m afraid, in this day and age, trust, which I count so, you know, I love loyalty. I love trust.

Elton John

And the danger is – and it’s happening – is we’re seeing an incredibly big rise amongst young gay people, young heterosexual people as far as catching HIV, which is, you know, in an educated country like this or in Britain, it’s frightening.

Elton John

I have a much better relationship with the press than I did, I think because I stood my ground.

Elton John

I love places that have an incredible history. I love the Italian way of life. I love the food. I love the people. I love the attitudes of Italians.

Elton John

I mean, in some cases with libel laws, you know, they can write things about people who have no course of action, because they can’t afford to take legal action against them.

Elton John

I mean, Sting is one of my great buddies and I love him to death.

Elton John

I never really made a full album in Los Angeles before.

Elton John

Because, I figured that, because I was a successful man, I was wealthy, I was, you know, seemingly intelligent – even that I am not intelligent enough to ask for help.

Elton John

But actually, my drug addiction thing, I was so stubborn.

Elton John

I am the most well-known homosexual in the world.

Elton John

I was more ashamed that I couldn’t work the washing machine than the fact that I was taking drugs.

Elton John

I’m a very wealthy man.

Elton John

I’m very generous.

Elton John

I’ve got a great collection of photography.

Elton John

I’ve got to do something to make up for all those self-absorbed and selfish years when I just, you know, was taking drugs, sitting in my room, doing bad things, whatever.

Elton John

I’ve only been interested in the artistic side of life.

Elton John

The great thing about rock and roll is that someone like me can be a star.

Elton John

The whole point of being in this business and being blessed and being successful is that you’re able to do things for your friends or your family, which means that they can have something special in their lives, too.

Elton John

I do like Britney Spears. I think she’s cute. I think she’s fun. And I like her records. You know, I’m not a pop snob whatsoever. I think she makes great pop records.

Elton John

I have a lot of money stashed away, but I do live my life from day to day.

Elton John

I think people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at goats though.

Elton John

I used to get my money at the end of the week, buy my mum something, or buy a record, and that was it.

Elton John

There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be very free with sex, they should draw the line at goats.

Elton John

We were both very much the same. We were both very impulsive. We both loved life. We both loved shopping. We both had a love of clothes, obviously, because he was the designer that I kind of wore forever and ever.

Elton John

Well, as I was saying… everyone’s so nice to me, usually.

Elton John

Well, I was making a record, and I had to choose a name, because they said, you know, you can’t make a record under the name of Reg Dwight, because it’s never going to – you know, it’s not attractive enough.

Elton John

Well, I’m a huge fan of Ryan Adams, who’s from North Carolina. And he’s beginning to break really quite big.

Elton John

Well, I’ve had my fair share in Britain of battling the tabloids.

Elton John

Who really needs a new album from me?

Elton John

Yeah. I have been with David Furnish for eight years, now.

Elton John

You won’t find any of these funny Chinese proverbs embroidered on pillows, but you may find them good for a giggle.

1. Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

2. Man who run in front of car get tired.

3. Man who run behind car get exhausted.

4. Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

5. Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

6. Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

7. Man with one chopstick go hungry.

8. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

9. Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

10. Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

11. Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth.

12. War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

13. Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

14. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

15. It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

16. Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

17. Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

18. Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

19. Man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.

20. Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

21. Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

22. Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time.

23. Man who finger girl having period get caught red handed.

24. Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.

25. Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.

26. Learn to masturbate — come in handy.

27. Man who buy drowned cat must pay for wet pussy.

28. It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.

29. Man who jizz in cash register come into money.

30. Woman who pounce on dead rooster go down on limp cock.

Winston Churchill was the leader of England during World War Two. He is a well-respected politican for the most part, known for his fiery speeches and his ability to keep his people optimistic and content during the tough times of the second Great War.

Churchill was a great orator and a clever wordsmith, and many of his quotes are just as funny as the other quotes are rousing and patriotic.

Here are my favorite Churchill quotes, some of them pointed and hilarious and other inspirational.

If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law.

Winston Churchill

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Winston Churchill

In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words, and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.

Winston Churchill

In those days he was wiser than he is now; he used to frequently take my advice.

Winston Churchill

Really I feel less keen about the Army every day. I think the Church would suit me better.

Winston Churchill

Russia is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.

Winston Churchill

Short words are best and the old words when short are best of all.

Winston Churchill

Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.

Winston Churchill

Politics is not a game. It is an earnest business.

Winston Churchill

Politics is the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn’t happen.

Winston Churchill

Solitary trees, if they grow at all, grow strong.

Winston Churchill

Some people regard private enterprise as a predatory tiger to be shot. Others look on it as a cow they can milk. Not enough people see it as a healthy horse, pulling a sturdy wagon.

Winston Churchill

In war as in life, it is often necessary when some cherished scheme has failed, to take up the best alternative open, and if so, it is folly not to work for it with all your might.

Winston Churchill

In war, you can only be killed once, but in politics, many times.

Winston Churchill

In wartime, truth is so precious that she should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.

Winston Churchill

India is a geographical term. It is no more a united nation than the Equator.

Winston Churchill

It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.

Winston Churchill

It is a fine thing to be honest, but it is also very important to be right.

Winston Churchill

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.

Winston Churchill

We shape our buildings; thereafter they shape us.

Winston Churchill

It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link of the chain of destiny can be handled at a time.

Winston Churchill

It is always wise to look ahead, but difficult to look further than you can see.

Winston Churchill

Kites rise highest against the wind – not with it.

Winston Churchill

Let our advance worrying become advance thinking and planning.

Winston Churchill

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.

Winston Churchill

Meeting Franklin Roosevelt was like opening your first bottle of champagne; knowing him was like drinking it.

Winston Churchill

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home.

Winston Churchill

History is written by the victors.

Winston Churchill

History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.

Winston Churchill

However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.

Winston Churchill

I always avoid prophesying beforehand, because it is a much better policy to prophesy after the event has already taken place.

Winston Churchill

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality by contact with this great novel land of yours which sticks up out of the Atlantic.

Winston Churchill

When the war of the giants is over the wars of the pygmies will begin.

Winston Churchill

When you are winning a war almost everything that happens can be claimed to be right and wise.

Winston Churchill

It is more agreeable to have the power to give than to receive.

Winston Churchill

It is no use saying, ‘We are doing our best.’ You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.

Winston Churchill

It was the nation and the race dwelling all round the globe that had the lion’s heart. I had the luck to be called upon to give the roar.

Winston Churchill

I am always ready to learn although I do not always like being taught.

Winston Churchill

I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else.

Winston Churchill

I am certainly not one of those who need to be prodded. In fact, if anything, I am the prod.

Winston Churchill

I am easily satisfied with the very best.

Winston Churchill

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

Winston Churchill

Without tradition, art is a flock of sheep without a shepherd. Without innovation, it is a corpse.

Winston Churchill

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing – after they’ve tried everything else.

Winston Churchill

You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.

Winston Churchill

Yogi Berra is famous for his baseball career as well as for his misuse and abuse of the English language.

Berra played almost his entire career for one team, the New York Yankees, and as such he is a representative of that storied franchise. Yogi Berra is considered the greatest catcher of all time, and the 52nd best non-pitcher in all of baseball history.

Here is a collection of his often hilarious quotes.

Congratulations. I knew the record would stand until it was broken.

Yogi Berra

Even Napoleon had his Watergate.

Yogi Berra

In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.

Yogi Berra

It ain’t over till it’s over.

Yogi Berra

It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.

Yogi Berra

It gets late early out there.

Yogi Berra

It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.

Yogi Berra

Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.

Yogi Berra

Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.

Yogi Berra

Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.

Yogi Berra

Slump? I ain’t in no slump… I just ain’t hitting.

Yogi Berra

So I’m ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face.

Yogi Berra

The future ain’t what it used to be.

Yogi Berra

The only color I don’t have is navy brown.

Yogi Berra

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.

Yogi Berra

The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase.

Yogi Berra

There are some people who, if they don’t already know, you can’t tell ‘em.

Yogi Berra

We have deep depth.

Yogi Berra

He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.

Yogi Berra

How can you think and hit at the same time?

Yogi Berra

I always thought that record would stand until it was broken.

Yogi Berra

I just want to thank everyone who made this day necessary.

Yogi Berra

I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?

Yogi Berra

A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.

Yogi Berra

All pitchers are liars or crybabies.

Yogi Berra

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.

Yogi Berra

Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical.

Yogi Berra

I never said most of the things I said.

Yogi Berra

I think Little League is wonderful. It keeps the kids out of the house.

Yogi Berra

I wish I had an answer to that because I’m tired of answering that question.

Yogi Berra

I’m a lucky guy and I’m happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.

Yogi Berra

I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.

Yogi Berra

If people don’t want to come out to the ball park, nobody’s gonna stop ‘em.

Yogi Berra

If the world was perfect, it wouldn’t be.

Yogi Berra

If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer.

Yogi Berra

We made too many wrong mistakes.

Yogi Berra

When you arrive at a fork in the road, take it.

Yogi Berra

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.

Yogi Berra

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

Yogi Berra

If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.

Yogi Berra

In baseball, you don’t know nothing.

Yogi Berra

It’s like deja-vu, all over again.

Yogi Berra

It’s pretty far, but it doesn’t seem like it.

Yogi Berra

You can observe a lot by just watching.

Yogi Berra

You should always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise, they won’t come to yours.

Yogi Berra

You wouldn’t have won if we’d beaten you.

Yogi Berra

You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.

Yogi Berra